What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
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He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
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Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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