Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize