6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You pole danced in your parka.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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