I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
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