she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
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Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
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Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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