my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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