I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize