the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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