fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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