God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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