You really coming over, don't trick.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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