she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
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I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
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Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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