does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize