Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
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I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
The Olympian is in my bed
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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