that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
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I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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