I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize