after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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