If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
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The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
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Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Im part way to drunk.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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