are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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