You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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