Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
He told me they were just razor bumps!
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champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
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I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize