i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize