I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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