Don't EVER smell your tampon
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
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This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize