I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
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If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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