My boss' voice literally gives me gas
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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