Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
A bitchslap is in order.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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