i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
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