her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize