they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
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It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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