I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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