Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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