Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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