Whod you bang
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
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He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
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I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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