I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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