Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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