Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize