she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
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I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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