Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize