Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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