Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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