then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize