Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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