whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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