; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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