He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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