i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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