"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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