Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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