She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
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